I am an army veteran who has trained in several different countries an who has spent the last 25 years in this Virginia prison. After working my way off of being at Sussex I for 8 years here at State Farm I thought that this would be a place where I could work, make a little money and hopefully parole from.
With this virus going on, I have been removed from my job for almost 30 days and I have no idea when I will have any income. My parents and only sibling are dead and I have no one to really depend on because I do not want to make my problem anyone else’s.
I was put into a cell with a child because we worked together and because he has mommy and daddy I have to suffer his lack of respect on all levels. He has been in prison a little over 3 years so of course we are not compatible but I need to try to find peace out of the cell. He does not leave the cell except to use the phone and shower and back in front of his tv.
This is my holy month of Ramadan but I am separated from all of the other guys in my community and everyone on my floor all go in different directions, spiritually and mentally. I find peace in myself. I run when I can go outside and usually it may be 5 or 6 guys all doing their own things. The few people in society I do call are so-called friends who have their own lives, when I can get a phone, but out of sight out of mind.
My counselor here is not one who I am used to so that title should be something else because right now she is more standoffish.
We have a phone line we can call for someone who may listen but supposed I say the wrong thing and the C.O.’s are at my cell with handcuffs. We are all given these little sneeze guards, some wear them, some don’t, offenders and staff. So men sneeze and cough in this small hallway we are confined to and if they wear the sneeze guard they slide it down from their face.
I worry, I watch the news and the health professionals all cannot agree on how long this virus will last so will my life in prison continue to be at a standstill? I have a sentence to fulfill, but will I get any type of relief since the severity of my crime will never change? In society, life a hustle where my skills can be used to support myself and assist others in this pandemic but in here I feel so helpless.
Prayerfully the powers that be will see that just maybe I can be an asset in society instead of a liability in here.